I think the biggest issue with modern gender identity politics in AAA fantasy or historical video games is that the writers seem to be mostly incapable of writing them in a way that feels organic to the setting instead of it feeling like the game characters are a bunch of modern transmigrators doing presentations on the material they learned in their gender studies 101 class.
Yeah sure, if it was executed better, the people who have a problem with it would still whine. But the trashy way it's written means they manage to also alienate plenty of people from queer communities or allies so maybe ... do better?